Leave it to the Imagination | Online Dating Chronicles: Part 12

Hi Everyone!

This is the last installment of my online dating chronicles. If you’ve missed previous posts, click the link(s) below!

Part 1: It Started One Night At A Bar Named ‘Darling’…

Part 2: The One Where Jen Swiped Right

Part 3: Play The Game, Playa

Part 4: Dipping My Toe In The Water

Part 5: How You Doin’?

Part 6: There’s Something Fishy Going On…

Part 7: Heeere, Fishy, Fishy, Fishy!!!

Part 8: Dobby Has No Master. Dobby Is A Free Elf!

Part 9: Who Am I? An Orphan Black Clone?

Part 10: Hi, I’d like one (man) to go, please!

Part 11: Why Are They Shirtless in a Public Bathroom?!

Today, I’m sharing with you what girls and guys should put in their profile pics and bios (what I think you should put).

Show an assortment of pictures:

  1. Non-blurry pic that clearly shows your face and eyes (NO SUNGLASSES). Not taken by a computer webcam…who uses webcam pics anymore?
  2. Show your fun side
  3. Don’t just put up group shots where we have to play Where’s Waldo and wonder “is that him or is that him?”

Don’t just post selfies. I’m sure you have at least one pic where someone else took a picture of you. Use pics that are from the last two years at the longest. One guy said his pics were from a while ago and he looked like he had an athletic/average body, but in his description, he chose ‘a few extra pounds’.

For most pics that I came across on guys’ profiles, a lot were blurry or grainy. If all of their pics are too good and professional looking, you should be using Google Reverse Image Search. I’ve said it before, but if they got the pictures from Instagram, then Google Reverse image search won’t come up with any results. If you see below, I searched my own photo that I used as a profile pic and I’ve posted it on my Instagram and it didn’t show up in the results.

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Next, I searched a picture that is on my blog, and it came up with my website for the results.

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Remember that personal trainer I was talking about? He posted three pics that were taken from a Personal Trainer from LA or something. I used Google Reverse Image Search on all three pics. The first two had no results, but then I caught him on the last one where it showed up on a gym’s website or something. AHA! Bingpot! (I’ve been binge-watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine).

For my profile pics, I didn’t do any group shots because I didn’t want to use pics of my friends without their permission and plus it felt weird to put a pic of them on my online dating profile. I made sure to post one close-up (head and shoulders) and a full-length shot. I didn’t post any revealing pictures (no bikini pics) and none were showing any cleavage or my butt. I’m not judging anyone who uses those pics, but if you’re posting those pics, then you’ll attract guys who are looking for hookups instead of a relationship. If a guy is looking for a girlfriend, he doesn’t want a girl showing her butt or wearing lingerie in her profile pics and putting it all out there to see. Sure, guys like to look at that, but a guy doesn’t want his potential girlfriend or wife to be posting pics on social media showing everything. Leave it to their imagination 😉

The same goes for guys. Let it be a nice surprise that you’ve got a six/eight pack. Not that you have to be toned and athletic for girls to like you. If you only post pics of your body (mirror selfies or just torso), then it makes me think that’s all you have to offer: a nice bod (or you’re too into how you look).

Of course, regardless of whether your pics are revealing or not, you will still get some gross messages. So, be prepared for that.

I saw an article in my research that said you should choose profile pics (at least the main one) where you’re NOT looking into the camera. I guess because it feels like they’re staring at us as we swipe and you get self-conscious and you’re like “oh, no, he knows I’m swiping left on him!!”

I did a combo of different pictures, but the ones I used for the majority of my time on the sites were:

  • a close-up pic of me looking away from the camera- wearing makeup (head and shoulders)
  • me in a Supergirl costume on Halloween (I’m wearing a tank top and a fit and flare mini skirt and tights)
  • A far away shot of me on the bridge from Inception
  • a full-length shot of me on the beach (wearing a tank top and shorts, not a bikini)
  • A pic of me wearing barely any makeup (just spot concealer) so they know what I look like without makeup. It was also from a different angle from the close up shot

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For the bio, write SOMETHING! It doesn’t have to be a paragraph, but just write something that you like to get a conversation going. I put a question after mine so they could answer it: What’s your fave A&W order? In the conversation starters for POF, I asked what their fave burger place was and who was their fave Batman. I got some good responses and plan to try out those burger places…thanks, guys! (Maybe I’ll do a blog post on the burgers and rate them).

This installment ends my online dating chronicles. I hope you enjoyed it and I hope for all of my fellow single ladies out there, it hasn’t discouraged anyone from trying dating sites. I probably had more fun with it than most because I wasn’t really trying to meet someone. If it worked out that way, then it would’ve been nice, but I wasn’t really putting in 100% into finding someone. Then again, I don’t know if I’d put in 100% and try so hard to find someone because when you least expect it, someone can pop into your life. Maybe you start off as colleagues/friends and then it becomes something more. As much as I would love to have a meet cute, those only happen in movies. I could never have a meet cute because of my Resting Bitch Face (RBF). I don’t know why, but sometimes my neutral face can be bitchy or I just look like I’m sad. Then again, the right person won’t even notice if you have RBF. My mom and sister’s RBF is strong, and my dad and brother-in-law have both said something similar to my mom and sister, “that’s just your face.” Some day, I’ll find the one who says that to me, hopefully I don’t have to date a bunch of donkeys/asses to get to my unicorn (do unicorns apply to men? or is it just referring to girls?). *shrugs* either way, he’s out there somewhere.

If you have any questions or want to share your experience on dating apps, feel free to email me via the Contact Form or leave a comment below!

Love,

jen

*This blog series is not affiliated or associated with any of the online dating sites/apps mentioned. It is also not meant to discourage any person from using these sites. This was just something I thought would be a fun topic to write about and let you know about my experiences with online dating.

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